"Carlos Beltran, It's Cold Outside"

It's that time of the year, folks! Christmas songs are aplenty this time of year and we want to contribute to the joyous melodies that grace your radio stations. We bring to you our special rendition of the beloved classic, "Baby, It's Cold Outside."

You really can't stay.
      Baby, it's cold outside.
You've really got to go away.
       Baby, it's cold outside.
Your past seasons in NY haven't been -
       Been hoping you'd take me back -
so very nice -
       I'll try to win your hearts, even though they're just like ice.

Your mother will start to worry (because we're going to dick punch you).
      Beauties, what's with all your fury?
Papa L. will be pacing the floor.
      But listen to the NY crowd roar!
Yeah, sure. Maybe have another drink more.
      Put my favorite song on while I rob the poor.

Everyone seems to forget -
      Baby, it's cold outside -
how bad you were when you were a Met -
      There's no other teams to be had out there -
We wish we knew how -
       I am a Yankee now -
to break this spell -
       I'll wear this hat, don't these pinstripes look swell?

We've been saying no, no, no -
      Mind if Jete and I get closer?
At least we're gonna continue to try -
     What's the sense in hurting my pride?
You really can't stay.
      Beauties, don't hold out. You know you want to wear my jersey.
We hope you get Herpes...it's so cold outside.

You've got to find a new home.
       But I'll freeze out there!
We really don't care.
       It's up to my knees out there!
You've really never been grand.
       I'll promise to catch the ball when it's fair!
Why don't people see?
       How can you do this thing to me?

You're bound to disappoint us tomorrow -
      Think of my three-year sorrow -
It seems that in St. Louis, you already hit your peak -
       if you made me A-hole of the Week...every week.
You really can't stay.
      Can't you forgive me for that strikeout?
We need really need you to go away.
      Beauties, you're so cold inside.
Die. And take Jacoby with you.

This will be our last blog of 2013. We know you're disappointed. To make you feel better about this whole situation, we'll post pictures of our New Year's shenanigans to Instagram and Twatter. If you're not already following us, do so. @TravelingBBabes. Don't miss out. We'll see you in 2014. Happy Holidays and May The Force be with you.

Failure to Launch

No need to adjust your computer settings, folks. This week’s posting really is that bad.

We hoped that you enjoyed your holidays this past weekend as well as our rendition of the “12 Days of Christmas!” We know that we promised you a glorious adventure to Cooperstown, but unfortunately, if you’ve been following the national weather reports, you’ll know that the New York area was hit by a major snow storm Sunday into Monday. In fact, the region is still recovering from the bombardment. The Long Island Railroad is now only just fully operational and there are still folks snowed in. Therefore, traveling to Cooperstown was simply not an option. We swear that we’re not exaggerating. We know firsthand just how terrible the roads were because we went to Croxley’s Ale House in Farmingdale for 20 cent wings and Sunday football and both of us got stuck in the snow near our houses. And Serena’s pretty sure that she drove most of the way home blind. There was enormous potential for her to drive by her exit without even realizing it.

So, it is with tremendous feeling of failure, that we report to you our results from last week’s poll before we call it a day. We wanted to know if there was any chance of Pedro Feliciano actually being an asset to the Yankees bullpen this season. 3 of you believe that nothing good ever came to New York from a pitcher named Pedro. We tend to agree with you on that one. Hellooooo? Pedro Martinez, anyone? 2 of you asked who the f Pedro Feliciano was and wondered what happened to Cliff Lee. In case you hadn’t heard, people, Cliff Lee is apparently controlled by a female’s private parts. We’re not going to talk about specifically who that female is, but if you conduct a process of elimination, we’re pretty sure that you can figure that out. Finally, 1 of you actually voted for the lyrics to that overplayed Alicia Keys and Jay-Z song. Sweet.

Have a happy and safe New Year’s Eve and hopefully, we’ll have a more accomplished blog posting for you next week.

 Happy Birthday  to everyone's favorite bitter Met Fan Papa L !!!