Injuries Love Company

In lieu of our All Star Game ranting, we asked how you felt about the game’s rule changes. All 5 voters agreed that it didn’t really matter because the All Star Game is just a popularity contest. No one felt that the rules were acceptable as they made no difference to anyone but the players and no one had a mental breakdown, muttering, “No. They’re stupid. The entire system is stupid. I hate the All Star Game. And I hate you for even bringing it up now.” Honestly, we assumed that you’d all vote for this option simply because it gave you the opportunity to tell us that you hated us. We’re a bit pleased that you didn’t choose it. Score 1 for the TBB.

The world of baseball has seen its fair share of ouchies this week. Baby Jesus aka Joe Mauer (see Wrigley Field post for more information on the strange religious reference) could potentially be out week to week rather than day to day with a bruised left heel, which he hurt last Friday night when he awkwardly stepped on first base as he lunged to beat out an infield single. This morning’s report claims that the heel is doing better, even allowing him to take batting practice prior to Thursday’s game against the Orioles, but he’s still out of the lineup. Sadness.

Javier Vazquez will skip his next scheduled start, which would’ve been against the Red Sox tonight, but not for any physical ailment. Joe Girardi wants to let Vazquez “catch his breath” somewhere other than Fenway Park we take it. He’ll be held back until Monday when he’ll face the Tigers in Detroit. Phil Hughes will make the start against Josh Beckett tonight instead, followed by CC Sabathia against Clay Buchholz on Saturday and AJ Burnett against Jon Lester on Sunday.

Back to actual physical problems. Jorge Posada left Monday night’s game against the Orioles with a mild calf strain and is listed as day to day. Girardi thinks that he could potentially return for this evening.

After receiving an MRI for general shoulder tightness, Mike Pelfrey was cleared to pitch tonight against the Giants, which is his regularly scheduled start. He’ll face Jonathan Sanchez. Lisa’s looking forward to it. If his shoulder is fine, what was the reason behind his asinine performance in Philly? Hmm? Tell us, Michael. Furthermore, you have an old man face and there’s no way you’re younger than us. Liar, liar, your pants are on fire. The remainder of this weekend’s pitching matchup in Flushing is set to be Wellemeyer against Santana on Saturday and Lincecum against Perez on Sunday.

Yankees GM, Brian Cashman does not think that Andy Pettitte will make his next scheduled start due to a mild inflammation in his left elbow. Pettitte had left Wednesday’s game after the 5th in the Yankees’ 7-5 win over the Orioles, lasting just long enough to earn another win, making his record 4-0 on the season. Not, Andy! Come back to us safely, Andy!

In mental/emotional instability news, Milton Bradley (let’s be honest. Is anyone shocked that this is the player we named here? Probably not) was placed on the restricted list on Thursday, 1 day after he requested help from his team in dealing with “emotional stress” from personal issues. We’ll refrain from making a sarcastic remark here. The Mariners have recalled outfielder Michael Saunders from Triple-A Tacoma to fill Bradley’s roster spot. While on the restricted list, Bradley cannot be in uniform or with the team. He’s expected to miss at least 5 days and manager Don Wakamatsu says that he will not be joining the team on their 8-game road trip that kicks off in Baltimore on Tuesday. Zucker Hillside Hospital is here for you, Milton, with open arms. The environment is very peaceful there, we hear.

Tomorrow, it will be exactly one week before the TBB takes off for California to see Erin, the Angels, the Dodgers, the Padres, and Shamu and go to Disneyland with The Favorite. Ask us what the TBB has done so far to prepare for this adventure. Have we worked out in order to be fit for bathing suit weather? Certainly not. In fact, we’re pretty sure that we’ve done less work, eaten more food, and imbibed more alcohol than during the entire Christmas season. Have we set aside clothes? No. We’re going naked, much to the chagrin of all who will be coming into contact with us during that week. Have we started a base tan? Nope. Again, pretty confident that we’re whiter than we’d been in December. In fact, we’d go so far as to say that we’re so white, we’re grey. Have we cashed in change jar yet? Nope, but at least we’re still collecting change so that’s a plus. Have we waxed our upper lip yet? No. We’re having a fiesta tonight and needed to grow our own moustaches. Needless to say we’re ill prepared. We apologize for referring to ourselves as the Traveling Baseball Babes because there’s definitely no babe here. False advertisement at its best.

This week’s baseball note: Speaking of being undefeated, Serena’s Barry Zito is on FIRE! His record stands at 5-0 after taking the Giants into the 8th in their 3-2 victory over the Marlins on Wednesday. He allowed 7 hits, giving up 1 run and 1 walk, and striking out 4. He has yet to give up a hit on that gorgeous curve ball of his. Since he’s made a complete turnaround from his past few dismal seasons and appears to have returned to his old self, we’re making him our TBB Super Hero of the Week, which we’re confident makes him feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Especially after reading about our moustaches. Sexy.

Robert Palmer spoke accurately of this week when he proclaimed, “Doctor, Doctor, give me the news. I’ve got a bad strain and I’m lovin’ the DL.”

Happy Holidays

We apologize for being a little late this week as Serena (the person responsible for posting our notes on time) was running so late for Christmas dinner that she forgot to post our blog. : / Sorry!

That being said, since we are in holiday mode, we’re only going to post the results from the poll and our baseball notes. Last Friday, we asked you which team had performed the best with off season acquisitions to date. The question only garnered 4 votes. We fear we’re losing you folks. The total vote results keep getting smaller and smaller. The winning choice with a pitiful 2 votes was, “The TBB. You ladies will definitely get a picture with TOWSNBN soon enough.” This must be because you feel guilty about the time you chose to put us on a TV show only if we were played by Alyssa Milano and Jessica Simpson. We can see right through you like a pane of glass. You cannot fool us. Only 1 person thought that the Mariners led the pack by signing Cliff Lee. After all, look what he did for the Phillies. 1 moron actually voted for the Mets. We’re not even giving you the satisfaction of making fun of you. No one voted for the Phillies and their acquisition of Roy Halladay, which we find a bit strange, but…to each his own.

On Tuesday, the Yankees rocked the boat a bit by signing RHP Javier Vazquez and LHP Boone Logan from the Atlanta Braves in exchange for OF Melky Cabrera, LHP Michael Dunn, RHP Arodys Vizcaino, and cash considerations. In further Team Jacob news, Roy Halladay took out a full-page newspaper advertisement thanking the city and the team’s fans. He is quoted as saying, “Toronto will forever have a special place in my heart. The memories will last a lifetime and so will my gratitude.” Roy—you stay classy in Philly. Serena apologizes for making fun of you for being a werewolf. That was rude. Nick Johnson’s contract as the Yankees’ new DH has been finalized. It gives Johnson $5.5 million next season and includes a $5.5 million mutual option with a $250,000 buyout. He can also earn $1 million annually in performance bonuses. Why don’t they have jobs like this posted on Monster.com?
Finally, we hope all of our readers have a healthy, happy holiday!