Yankees v Indians 9-18-21

Well, it's the middle of September already. Not that you'd know that from the sweaty gym balls-style weather that we've been having. We were looking forward to a pleasant outdoor experience during a late season baseball game. Instead, we've left the game with sun burns and suffering from dehydration. Probably didn't help that we started our afternoon off with wine instead of water, but that is not our fault. It should have been mid-70's at most and the Yankees shouldn't be selling souvenir carafes and wine glasses. It just spells trouble. 

Also, as you can see in this photo, we totally crushed the Don Mattingly bobblehead giveaway. This is largely thanks to Clear. That line was super quick compared to the rest of the security lines around the stadium AND due to an unwarranted amount of traffic for a mid-Saturday, we were totally late getting to the ballpark. So, anyone that tells you that the annual fee for Clear isn't worth it is a big, fat liar. They're lying to you and to themselves. Clear, we're ready for our paid sponsorship/advertising contract. Hit us up. 

We actually watched 4 innings of the game from this view because it was shaded and the temperature was much cooler here. Then we got hungry and foolishly decided to head up to our seats, thinking that the upper deck "always gets such a nice breeze." We got no such nice breeze, but we did go old school with our food selection - a nice, reliable spicy sausage and peppers sandwich. We've learned a few things over the years and the number 1, most important thing we learned is to not photograph yourself eating a sausage or a hot dog. Ever. It's horrifying. 

The Yankees took a giant sh*t on the field and called it a baseball game. They chose not to play today. Unfortunately, they didn't give us the option to not pay for our tickets. At least we got our bobbleheads. We received several offers from people requesting to buy it from us, but Serena felt that since it was Don Mattingly, it was a priceless artifact and Lisa's asking price was too high. The highest offer we got was $10, but Lisa held out for a Louis Vuitton bag. 

We decided that we needed ice cream, so we went in search of a Ben & Jerry's. The line at the stand in our section was personally offensive, so we decided to go downstairs to the main concourse, thinking we'd have more stands to choose from. We did not. The line in the food court was even worse, so we ended up on the Grand Slam Shake stand because no one was there. 

While tasty, it wasn't what we wanted, so it didn't really satisfy our cravings. Lisa got the cereal one and Serena got the celebration one. It was too hot to go back to our seats, so we ended up watching the rest of the sh*t show standing around the main concourse. Bunch of clowns. 

Mets v Pirates 7-11-21

We've not been the best baseball game attenders this season considering we're the "Traveling Baseball Babes," but in our defense, the extended lockdown done did us dirty. Suddenly, our weekends are filled with birthday parties, rescheduled bridal/baby showers, rescheduled weddings, bachelorette parties, anniversary parties, bbqs, and all of the other sh*t people enjoyed having before the pandemic hit and now they are all crammed into the same tiny window instead of being spread out throughout the year. We've literally had zero time to attend baseball games. Hell, we haven't even had time to post these recent blogs. Look at us. We're two months behind on sh*t.  

Which brings us to this particular Mets game. Normally, we pick games for a specific reason. Maybe it's the opponent, but mostly it's due to a special bobblehead giveaway. In this scenario, we picked it because it was the only Sunday we had free to go to game together. We didn't even know that there was a free giveaway (a Jacob DeGrom jersey) until the night before and Serena had to work so late on Sunday that we assumed we'd never get to the park early enough to get one.

For whatever reason, security had us circle around the ballpark before funneling the entire Tri-State area into one parking lot entrance. Seemed a bit ridiculous and inefficient to us, but what do we know? We didn't go to security guard school. We parked roughly 30 minutes to game time and since we were convinced that we didn't have a shot in hell at getting the DeGrom jersey, we meandered leisurely over to the gate with the shortest line. 

Lo and behold, we managed to get inside very quickly AND snag a pair of jerseys, which will come in handy next season when we finally get to make our way back to the ballpark again. 

They're shockingly not bad. Usually the free giveaway jerseys are absolute trash or the color is totally offensive, but here, neither was the case. 

We grabbed a pair of beers and headed up to watch the game. This is the view from our seats:

We weren't hungry yet (shocking, I know), so we hung out in our sweltering seats for roughly 6 innings. The Mets were performing marvelously, leading 5-2 before we headed to the Jim Beam Suite for air conditioning and food. This time around, we got ourselves some wine because we're classy broads like that. Also, we're suckers for souvenirs cups (as you can see). 

We also split a Polar Burger and an Ultimate Grilled Cheese. The burger was $16.50 and the grilled cheese was $10.25. 

The burger was Pat LaFrieda's black truffle blended burger patty with maple spiced caramel onions, smoked gouda, lettuce, tomato (which Serena picked off), and claw sauce on a brioche bun. The grilled cheese was provolone and american cheeses with pimiento spread in a pinwheel flatbread and it was served with what they called "tomato fondu," but let's call a spade a spade. It was served with a cup of jarred marinara sauce. 

While we stuffed our faces, Pittsburgh managed to scrape another 2 runs across, making the score 5-4. They wanted to make it interesting for us. We still didn't think much of it because the Mets were hot and the Pirates sucked (they still suck). We watched the game in the air conditioning until the bottom of the 8th when we decided that we needed ice cream (bottomless f*cking pits we are apparently). 

The line to the ice cream and waffle stand was so long that we ended up watching the remainder of the game from the line. 

And what a remainder of a game it was - the Pirates scored 2 more runs in the top of the 9th and closed it out to win 6-5. 

Oracle Park (the park formerly known as AT&T Park)

 June 5, 2021

We had a 7am flight out of New York to San Francisco. The trip was mostly supposed to be a wine-centric vacation with the purpose of us getting SOMEWHERE that wasn't our homes after a long lockdown. Not sure what prompted us to even look up the Giants' schedule (because as you know, we've already hit this park), but we did and discovered that they'd be home the weekend we were arriving in San Francisco. Unfortunately, due to COVID protocols, the Giants were not yet selling tickets to the general public. Only season ticket holders had access to buy. However, the wonders of social media came to our rescue. We posted one little story on Instagram seeking advice regarding tickets and one of our kick ass followers replied with the hook up! She bought tickets via her account on our behalf and we were in! 

Anywho, back to our arrival in San Francisco. We didn't have much time available to us before our 5pm game, but we managed to squeeze a lot in: Alcatraz, Fisherman's Wharf, Pier 39, and mini doughnuts. We arrived and snapped our exterior photo of the ballpark, including a retake of us outside the Willie Mays Gate. 

Now:

Then:

Before we went inside, we stopped at the team store so that Lisa could get herself a hat and also visited McCovey Cove because we never documented it the first time around. We got to see someone snag a home run ball during batting practice. 

California was a little behind New York in their COVID protocols, so the attendance capacity was less than what we would've experienced at Citi Field or Yankee Stadium. There were still vaccinated and unvaccinated seating sections. We still had to wear masks at least until we got to our seats and most importantly, many of the concession stands were still closed. This is not a complaint by any means. It was just a different experience from what we've had. As we walked around our section trying to decide what we wanted to eat, we found these fun Lego set ups:

We ended up with pretty basic food, but no complaints here. We ate all of it and enjoyed every bite. We think it cost us roughly $40 for both of our dinners and beers, but truthfully, we can't remember and we apparently spent so much money on random sh*t that day that we can't decipher our bank statements as to what's what. The ballpark was entirely cashless also by the way, which was unexpected, but obviously we managed because we didn't go hungry. 

Oh! This picture of us in these custom sweatshirts (made by @evieandzoedesigns) just reminded us of a funny interaction with one of the park staff people. He spotted our shirts and loved them so much that he took several photos of us with his phone. Either he thought we were celebrities (we sort of are...and if we're not, we aren't sure what the f*ck is taking so long on that front)or he was a creep. Somewhere in the state of California, is an Oracle Park security guard with at least 10 photos of us in the same pose and facial expression. He didn't even bother to take a selfie with us. 

Back to the game. The Giants, for the most part, dominated, but it did get hairy towards the end.  At one point Brandon Crawford bulldozed Evan Longoria in attempt to get the ball. We've never seen anything like it. Not even at one of Lisa's nephew's little league games. They did win the end even though they made it interesting. And so did we. We went back to our hotel and passed the f*ck out face down in our beds before going on the bike tour from hell the following morning. We'd tell you about it, but that's for a completely different type of blog. 

Yankees v Athletics 8-31-19

Lisa chose this game because the free giveaway was a lightweight hoodie. We assumed that the hoodie would be given to the first 40,000 guests, but unfortunately it was 18,000 and Serena worked way too late for us to get a free giveaway. The only reason Lisa isn't disappointed by this is the fact that the hoodie was a little too lightweight for her taste.

Thanks to Clear, we flew through the security line again. The feeling of power and superiority that goes with passing all of the peasants on the regular security line is truly intoxicating. We got through so quickly that despite leaving Serena's house one hour prior to game time, we managed to get into the stadium and to our food choice prior to first pitch. It was amazing.

We had a hard time choosing food this time around because we've pretty much eaten everything by this point, so we ended up at Mighty Quinn's BBQ again because it's so reliable and they had the shortest line. Lisa ordered baby back ribs and Serena ordered the Burnt Ends sandwich and a side of french fries. With our water bottles, we spent a total of $58. This seems to be a pattern with us lately.We grabbed a table and ate at the nearby AT&T Sports Lounge.

 

 

After our meal, we grabbed beers and headed to our seats.

 

 

The game was very exciting. It even went into extra innings.

We realize that we are the Traveling Baseball Babes and you probably tune into this blog and expect to read baseball-related items once in awhile, but you're not going to find that here today. What you're going to find is an entire blog post ripping apart our seat neighbors because we were surrounded by a-holes. It all began with the couple sitting behind us. Someone came up the stairs looking for his seats, but he had a difficult time. Instead of helping him, the wife started yelling at him to sit down. The husband loudly claimed, "you can't stand there the whole game!" For starters, he was there for maybe two minutes before these two started screaming at him. Secondly, if they wanted him to move so badly, they should've offered him assistance instead of being d*cks about the situation. As the man headed back down the stairs to find an usher to help him, the husband muttered a racist remark that we're not going to repeat here. That's the kind of people we were dealing with.

An elderly man with a cane accidentally tripped on a step and fell into the husband and his platter of chicken fingers. Instead of being concerned for this man's safety, the couple acted outraged. As if this man wanted to land in a plate of chicken fingers. After the old man collected himself and continued his way up the stairs, we heard the wife say, "we almost lost the chicken fingers." Really?

Then he started sh*t with us and that simply would not do because we cannot let anything go. We hold grudges for lifetimes and beat dead horses. We're dogs with a bone. The worst part is the fact that we're both exactly the same in this department so when one of us has a raging fire going, instead of helping to put the fire out, the other simple throws gasoline on top of the fire and watches it spread. Our seats had a railing in front of us and blocked the view of home plate. In order to see anything, we had to lean forward and look over the railing, which is exactly what Serena was doing when the man decided to yell at her. "You need to sit back. I can't see anything." Really? You're a foot taller than Serena and you're sitting in the row above us. How is that possible? From that point on, we made it a point to stand for everything. Are you sitting 20 seats away and need to get by for the bathroom? No problem. We'll stand the entire time and wait for you to reach us. Lisa will even encourage you. "Take your time. We're in no rush." Is there a wave about to go down? We're so down. In fact, let's start the wave. Every single play, we stood and high fived one another. To anyone who lingered in the aisle looking for their seats, we warned them loudly, "Oh, you better watch out. The seat police are going to yell at you." During the seventh inning stretch, they moved onto the stairs because they couldn't see around us. Couldn't see what? We're not sure because what exactly is so exciting on the field during the seventh inning stretch?

By the time Lisa returned from getting us ice cream in a helmet cup ($18 total) in the 8th inning, they had left.

Lisa was forced to get this pink helmets because that's all they had. Which is odd. They also had no change so Lisa was forced to use her card to pay for them. Also odd.

Anyway, back to our seat neighbors.The people in the row next to us were sitting in our actual seats but since there were two empty seats at the end of the aisle, we didn't complain. There was about seven people total in this group and we didn't interact with all of them. Most of the nonsense came from the two men directly next to us. One was an older gentleman wearing a Mets jacket, but complained loudly about the Mets the entire time. And also about the Yankees. He was very angry but seemed to be somewhat supportive of the A's. The one next to him was a young guy wearing full Athletics' attire. He complained about Yankee Stadium, but had never been to Oakland (if he'd had, there's no way he would've complained about our stadium because Oscar the Grouch's garbage can is nicer than the Coliseum). He knew all of the players' specific cheers that only an A's fan would know, but spoke with a New York accent. It's okay to root against the home team (even though the seventh inning stretch song specifically says you shouldn't), but don't be an a-hole about it. They were simply over the top about their anti-Yankee-ness. Finally, Serena had to ask the question. "Did you fly in from San Jose or San Francisco?" They laughed. They were from the Bronx. They were Mets fans who just hated the Yankees. So Serena asked why the whole A's outfit for a team they don't care about. The old man laughed and basically called the young kid an idiot. Somehow we mentioned that we went to all thirty ballparks, which is something we tend to blurt out a lot. To anyone who'll listen really. And to some who don't really want to talk to us at all. The old man got so excited by this and he introduced us to one of his friends at the other end of the aisle. This man had been to over 7,000 baseball games and had a spreadsheet tabulating all of the ballparks he'd been to, the date of the games, the score, etc. It was pretty incredible. Our thirty ballparks didn't seem so fancy after checking out this spreadsheet.

Oh, and the Yankees won in extra innings thanks to back to back Brett Gardner and Mike Ford solo home runs.

 

The End.

Mets vs. Marlins 8-6-19

Lisa filled out a survey emailed to her from the Mets and as a thank you gift, the Mets granted her two field level seats to select mid-week games of her choice. At the time of the survey, the Mets were still sucking a bag of d*cks, so it was likely that the Mets' offices were simply trying to put butts in the seats. By the time the game rolled around, the Mets were contenders again, which means that this is the first time something actually worked out to our advantage. Serena found player t-shirts on sale at Modell's, so we finally got ourselves adorable Mets and Yankees shirts to wear to the games.

 

(FYI: this photo was featured on @MetsHotties on Instagram. That's how cool we are. And it basically means that we're famous).

Also at the game, we got suckered into signing up for Clear so that we can get into the New York ballparks faster (and also through airport security). It's amazing. We've already used it once at Yankee Stadium and we plan on using it for our Disney trip in October. Lines will be a thing of the past! At least at airports and local sporting events.

Thanks to Clear, we flew into Citi Field and headed right for food. We had a difficult time deciding what to eat so Lisa stood on the Blue Smokehouse line and ordered the mac and cheese topped by brisket and Serena stood on the taco stand and ordered the nachos topped by barbacoa and two bottles of water. Blue Smoke cost us $13 and the nachos cost us $24.

In retrospect, this was probably too much food.

Afterwards, we headed to our seats.

 

The Marlins had a pretty rough night. Both Wilson Ramos and Pete Alonso hit home runs in the 5-0  beatdown.

 

Remember how we ordered too much food? Then we did this:

 

We've been dying to get these home run apple cups since Citi Field started serving them, but every time we've gone, it's been a little too chilly for ice cream. Our only complaint is that we had to get soft serve, which Serena finds incredibly irritating. She thinks it's fake ice cream. One step above those ridiculous Dip N' Dots. Lisa doesn't mind it as much. They should offer legit ice cream as an option. Citi Field already has legit ice cream at other concession stands. This was also a $24 expense. Apparently, we like to throw money away like we're Antonio Brown. At least if it was real ice cream, $24 would have been less offensive.