Since our posting focused on injuries around the league, we asked if there were any players that you wished would just stay on the DL. Only 4 people actually voted, which isn’t even the hurtful part of the situation. 2 people agree with us that there are some folks that should live out their careers on the DL i.e. Milton Bradley or in our case, Carlos Beltran. 1 really optimistic soul preferred to have all men on deck. Good for you, pal. You stay gold, Pony bboy. Lastly, someone decided to tear millions of incisions into our hearts by voting for the option, “we wish YOU would stay on the DL. Stop Blogging! You’re a-holes.” Actually, sir (or ma’am), we’re pretty sure that YOU’RE an a-hole.
As previously mentioned, we’ve done nothing so far to get us into bikini shape. In fact, between the two of us, we’ve gone to the gym 3 times in a week and half and we’ve probably eaten more food than the US Army has in a month. So we regret to inform The Favorite that when he babysits us at the pool while Erin goes to work, he may want to bring a barf bag. The good news is that if he gets tired of us and wants us to shut up, all he has to do is throw food into our pie holes. In a more disturbing note, Erin will have to keep a close eye on us at Sea World because someone may try to throw us back into the tank and Lisa can’t swim.
The good news is that we actually went to TD Bank yesterday on our lunch break to deposit our change into the Penny Arcade:
In Fred K’s Cancer news, we’ve recently received two awesome donations. One came from Serena’s co-worker and the creator of Lisa’s favorite brownies and the other was given by Brother of The Favorite. Thanks to their generous support and the charity of others, we are almost halfway to our fundraising goal. For their kindness, we’ve dubbed them Super Hero of the Next Two Weeks (as we will not be blogging from the Dumbo ride next week, much to the happiness of one a-hole reader who thinks we should stay on the DL and quit blogging altogether. Furthermore, since you have two weeks, we expect a high response on our poll). We’ve also collected quite a few awesome items to raffle off. We’ll be selling these raffles, our awareness pins, kick ass bracelets, and giving away Avon samples at the Bellmore Spring Festival on May 29th. If you happen to be in that area, please feel free to stop by…and maybe make a donation?
On to this week’s baseball notes: That retard Dallas Braden contributed something to baseball other than trash talk this week. In Sunday’s Athletics’ 4-0 victory over the Rays, Braden threw the 19th perfect game in history. The last perfect game was thrown last July by White Sox pitcher, Mark Buehrle…also against the Rays. Ouch. Maybe now Braden will be happy and keep his fat pie hole shut. Joe Mauer returned to the lineup on Sunday in the DH role against the Orioles. He went 1 for 3 with one walk. On Tuesday, he finally returned to his position behind the plate and went 3 for 4 with a homer and a double. On Tuesday night, the Padres handed Zito his first loss on the season. Sadness. We hope that making him the TBB Super Hero of the Week didn’t jinx him because that would be depressing. He lasted 5 innings and allowed 6 hits, 3 runs, and a season high 7 walks. It is his shortest outing of the year so far.
Carol King calls to us with, "So won't you carry me back to California. I've been on the road too long. Take me to the West Coast."
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