Last week, in addition to wishing you a happy holiday, we asked you what reason a certain TBB fan that shall remain nameless might be obsessed with Serena’s arms. 1 person thinks it’s because her arms are 20 inch pythons so who wouldn’t be obsessed? Okay, we’ll have you know that they’re NOT 20 inches. Sheesh. 4 individuals explained it simply as, “he’s a Phillies fan. Why do Phillies fans do half the things that they do?” 1 other person thinks that he is jealous of her arms and desperately wishes that Serena would train him like she trains Lisa every Sunday morning. Strangely enough, no one chose the option, “he is afraid of her.” Hm.
The A’s continue to astound us with their butchering techniques. They sent Ryan Sweeney and two-time All Star Andrew Bailey to the Red Sox for another outfielder and 2 prospects. At this point, it’s safe to call the A’s the New York Islanders of baseball. Thank you for giving up on all hope, Oakland. Perhaps you’ll be joining the Islanders in Oklahoma in a few years.
The St. Louis Cardinals, as we all know, have lost Albert Pujols. Who is the big name that they replace him with? A hairy, dark mole. We mean, Carlos Beltran. May he rot in hell the day that he dies. Beltran and the Cardinals apparently agreed to the 2-year deal worth $26 million late last week. Beltran is getting closer and closer to us with each team move he makes. We were thankful when he left for San Francisco. The city’s across the country and we’ve already been to AT&T Park. Of course, we felt it would’ve been better if he relocated to Japan. Now he’s in the middle of the country. His proximity is becoming uncomfortable. Plus, we haven’t done our Kansas City/St. Louis tour yet. We’d been contemplating it for 2013. Now this plan may have to change.
Being it’s that time of year again where we’re both bored and antsy for the baseball season to get started, Serena tested our Facebook fans with a little trivia quiz. Identify the baseball-related movie that this quote came from (bonus points for identifying the individual who said it): “Heywood leads the league in most offensive categories, including nose hair. When this guy sneezes, he looks like a party favor.” The first person to answer this correctly was TBB fan Daniel Perez. As a prize, Serena offered him TBB Super Hero of the Week honors. Since he hasn’t gotten back to us with a photo as of yet, Serena decided to go with someone she’s particularly fond of: Osi Umenyiora.
Lastly, we hope everyone had a fabulous and safe New Year! We’ll return to you with a proper TBB blog next Sunday for our first post of 2012.