Sunday, August 27, 2017

Yankees' Star Wars Night 8-25-17

We could not miss getting this free giveaway. It was a Darth Vader pom pom knit hat. Missing the Thor bobblehead was bad enough. To miss Vader would be a travesty. Therefore, we arrived two hours early and stood on this asinine line:

We were concerned. This was feeling a little bit like Thor day. Fortune finally favored us because once the gates opened, the stadium security started funneling us into shorter corals. We scored our hats and were immediately greeted by the Jedi and Sith.

From here, we went to the section where we had met Chewbacca and sure enough:
Han Solo isn't looking at the camera as you can see.. We took five photos. Han wasn't looking at the camera in any of them. Because he spent the entire time yelling at Serena for her tank top. It featured a graphic of Darth Vader and Baby Luke Skywalker and Jengo Fett and Baby Boba. On the bottom it says, "my dad is cooler than your dad." Han insisted that he was a better father than both of those dads, but let's be serious. He was murdered by his son. Who is an a-hole. Which Serena told him. Hence, this photo.

The characters headed toward the field shortly after, so we chose to get food. First, we started with garlic french fries. Then we stood on line for Mighty Quinn's barbecue. While waiting, we ate all of them.

After which, we proceeded to order a burnt ends sandwich, mac and cheese, and a crispy spicy chicken sandwich ($14, $8.50, and $13). Serena was going to order the brontosaurus rib because what the f*ck is that? But then we saw the price. $38. Um, no.
We ate our food and watched the Star Wars festivities from the upper deck.

Then we met a jawa. Which was awesome.
Views from our seats:

Some more fun tid bits:

Now for the constructive criticism:
* Why does Darth Vader hang out in the suites? Why can he not mingle with us riff raff? Change this immediately, Yankees. Immediately.
* Why were players permitted to choose their music for this game? At bat music should've been from the Star Wars soundtrack.
* The rally video montage should've included the Millennium Falcon hovering over the stadium instead of the Yankees doing baseball activities in slow motion.
* Kylo Ren should not be permitted on the field, in the building, or anywhere near the building. He should be forced to walk through the streets of the Bronx by himself.
* Also, no Rogue One characters. That was a bullshit movie.
* The players should make it their business to learn something about the movie franchise because far too many of the players questioned about Star Wars Night didn't know what the hell they were talking about, which is borderline offensive. 
* The Yankees should make more of an effort to win on Star Wars Night.

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