Tim Lincecum Appreciation Day 2011

Last week, you kids were on your own to deal with Serena. For that, Lisa apologizes, but we’re pretty sure she didn’t insult THAT many people. Since us blogging separately is a very rare occasion, we asked your thoughts on it. Of the 6 people who voted, 4 of you think that we’re “the dynamic duo, but I’m willing and able to take you solo as well.” 2 of you tactfully chose, “I feel like dealing with you separately makes your personalities more tolerable.” Why we can kind of understand where you’re coming from, it still hurts to hear you say that. No one chose, “I don’t handle change well. Please stop changing the criteria of this blog. Either blog together or not at all.”

Without further ado, welcome to our 3rd Annual Tim Lincecum Appreciation Day! Sound the trumpets! We’re blogging pretty early today considering we were out late partying with Timmy for Lisa’s birthday. Then we cuddled in Serena’s Egyptian cotton comforter and watched Zombieland before passing out.

Today was an excellent year. Ours and Timmy’s relationship has really blossomed into a beautiful and exotic flower. In October, Timmy traveled abroad with us. Upon arriving in France, he was strip searched, which completely flabbergasted us! Don’t the French know who Tim Lincecum is?!! Regardless, we can’t wait for him to join us in Greece to celebrate Serena and Maria’s 30th birthdays.

Timmy rocked out with his bad self during our 80’s Rock Party. We’re not sure why he chose to wear lime green fishnet stockings, but what’s important is that he fully embraced the party’s theme. He ended up getting really drunk on Uncle Pat’s mysterious grain alcohol concoction, sang Bon Jovi’s “Runaway,” and passed out in the middle of Serena’s living room surrounded by chips. The following morning wasn’t pretty…for any of us.

He was nice enough to spend the night with us in the city for Serena’s birthday. Even though it was supposed to be a girls’ weekend, Jess and Maria tolerated Timmy. After all, he paid for our meal at Ninja New York. Afterwards, while sitting around in our pj’s in our room at the grand Waldorf Astoria, he let us braid and crimp his luscious locks.

He even joined us at the Coors Brewery during our trip to Denver! Since it was in the middle of the season, he couldn’t stay long, but it was nice to have his company even for a short while.

As is tradition with Tim Lincecum Appreciation Day, we have some fun facts about everyone’s favorite Freak! Did you know…
that Timmy played football and basketball in high school (which we find amazing since he’s like 2 feet tall and weighs 5 lbs.)?
he has a bulldog named Cy?
that he polishes his spikes before every game?
that his parents split up in 2002? This is why Serena and Timmy are “like peas and carrots” because they’re both babies of divorce.
that if he could spend one day with a famous person, it would be Sandy Koufax?
that according to an article published in March of 2011, he drives a silver Mercedes? Oh, that Timmy. So high class. It’s definitely a smooth ride. We know this because he was our designated driver last night.
that he and his brother have the same tattoo? It means “man” in Japanese. This is perfect considering how often we rant about men who are not men.
that his favorite ice cream off of the ice cream truck is the Choco Taco? His second is the rocket pop (which happens to be Serena’s favorite).
that on June 6th, he recorded his 1,000th career strikeout against the Washington Nationals’ Jerry Hairston Jr.? This accomplishment comes during his 5th year in the Majors, making him only the 8th pitcher in history to do this.
that he uses MGMT’s song, “Electric Feel” and The Doors’ song, “Light My Fire” as his walk-up music during every game?
that he is part Filipino?
that since he was born on June 15th, he’s a Gemini? This makes him compatible with Lisa as a Leo, but very incompatible with Serena as a Pisces.

“Come on, Timmy, light our fire. Try to set the night on fire.”