Sunday, August 28, 2011

When Irene is a Rockin,’ Don’t Bother Knockin’

According to last week’s poll, no one wants us to change our blog name because you’re all fans of the status quo. That’s good because we’re also pretty lazy and weren’t looking forward to changing the web address, email address, and business cards. Hooray for the status quo!

Us East-coasters got the brunt of Hurricane Irene last night. Some people felt her wrath worse than others. Serena thinks everyone made a big hullabaloo for nothing. She’s got a bunch of tree branches scattered all over the property while the Rite Aid next door to Lisa lost its fence. Lisa still managed to attend a baby shower yesterday. Folks living near fallen trees are without power. For safety purposes, we’ve decided to blog via email and cell phones instead of sitting together in Serena’s living room while watching the Yankees/Orioles doubleheader.

Irene postponed yesterdays Yankees/Orioles game, Mets/Braves game, and the Jets/Giants pre-season matchup (and by extension our beer and wings night at Croxley’s Ale House). In preparation of Irene, the MLB also canceled today’s Mets/Braves game…yesterday. Better safe than sorry, we suppose. Serena was relegated to watching season 4 of Rescue Me on Netflix because of all these postponements.

Justin Verlander earned his 20th victory, which brought a smile to Serena’s face. Tigers Love Pepper and they also love Verlander.

Another fun fact from this weekend: Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly have called it quits. Under no circumstances should Mamadukes be notified of this. Serena does not want to date Derek Jeter. Thanks to some stupid television special, Lisa likes Jeter now too. It’s awful. We might as well give Lisa a t-shirt that says, “I <3 Golden Boys.” It’s becoming a very Jeterific nightmare here. Serena might run away to live in the Verlander household. It’s safer there. There’s no talk of Jeter or TOWSNBN or that Serena’s just not trying hard enough to date a Yankee.

Finally, on August 25th, the Yankees set a grand slam record, being the first team to ever hit 3 grand slams in one game. Curtis Granderson, Robinson Cano, and Russell Martin all went deep in the Yanks’ 22-9 victory over the A’s. It’s no surprise that of all the teams to do this, it was the Yankees. AJ Burnett might give up 12 runs, but the good news is that the Yankees can fix all that up with 3 grand slams! Yay!

Dexy’s Midnight Runners closes things out today with: “Come on, Irene, oh, we swear that you’re mean.  At this moment, you’ve ruined everything! With you, NY’s a mess, our games’ got postponed. Verge of boredom. Ah, go home, Irene!
(Just an FYI: We had no idea how filthy this song was until we Googled the lyrics. We feel soiled having read them).  

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