Sunday, January 17, 2016

We've Got The Opening Day Blues

So...what did we accomplish thus far? We ordered over $50 worth of sushi, ate it, and are still hungry. We even asked Brother's lady friend if we could have her side order of chips from Taco Joe's. Still no word on that front, but it would be really nice if she'd just share her chips with us. Also, Brother yelled at us for still being hungry, which is really judgmental on his part. Another problem is that Serena's bed is EXTREMELY devastating in that once you enter it, it's next to impossible to leave. As a result, we are in a puppy pile with Isolde (aka: Kitty/Black Panther/Beastly/Fur Monster/Asshole) watching Batdad's videos on Facebook. All these videos managed to do is outline our desired mates and apparently, we have more in common in that subject than originally thought. While the physical attributes may differ drastically on most occasions (Lisa enjoys the Guido fist pumpers that are born under the Sagittarius sign and Serena likes scruffy brunettes with tattoos), it seems that who we're both searching for is a hilarious idiot. Like us, but less of an asshole. Someone needs to keep us in check. 

We've asked Isolde repeatedly to bring us the lady friend's chips, but she does nothing. She just sits there. Occasionally, she swats Lisa. A beautiful moment happened, however. Lisa turned to Serena and said, "I wish we had The Force." She's learning. Unfortunately, we don't have The Force. The chips are still in the other room.*sigh*

Lucky for you the internet machine was within reach.

Starting 2016 off right, here's our first bitch fest of the year: Opening Day tickets. The Mets have repeatedly shut down any attempt on our part to acquire tickets to this momentous day.  We can procure tickets to the night after Opening Day and every other Mets' home game thereafter. Opening Day? Not so much. It's like they're toying with us. They send us emails about how tickets are on sale and they even give give us the little ticket icon when we check out the schedule, but they don't deliver.
Every time we try, we get a very rude, standoffish message. If they don't want to go to bed with us, they shouldn't flirt with us. It's indecent.

The Yankees at least have the courtesy to just withhold all single game ticket sales. They may be prude and all about delivering an "access denied" message, but at least they're consistent. We can understand consistency. It's comforting. Even when it means we aren't wanted.

Rant over. Mic drop. We're out.

1 comment:

  1. maybe youse have The Force but misplaced the directions in some Taco Bell wrappers.

    (celebrates birthday near the end of November! yay! more Irishy than Italia though...does Lisa have a slightly older cousin? :P)